The Ride

People my weight are not suppose to be able to ride blocks let alone miles... I've said it before. I'm 450lbs. It is who I am. My weight issues have been the stuff of legends. But that is a story for another day.

Fact is people my weight class in theory shouldn't be able to go on rides of my nature and survive. But I do it often. The fact that I can is rather amazing. I've had my beach cruiser style bike for over eight years. My rides are sometimes the stuff of legends. Since I've had this bike I've put on way more miles than I have ever expected to do so. To the point that I sometimes stop in to Bicycle Village on the ride. Which when all is said and done is a seven mile round trip for me.  They know the history of me and the bike. They know that when I go for a ride. It is always a ride that most people would not consider. Bike like that is only rated for about 250lbs. Over the years I've had to replace parts on it. Such as the crankshaft I broke last week.

Riding for me is a major release of energy. It allows me to get out into the world around me and surround myself with the sights and sounds of what is in this world. Over the years it has helped me recover from some of my more epic and dramatic falls. Helping me though bouts of arthritis pain that has developed in both of my knees. Partly because of the weight. Partly because I keep falling. It is also one of the few things I can do to help drown out the tinnitus. It creates background noise that gives me some relief for a bit from the constant tone that I hear. Riding is something that I truly enjoy doing. I have a lot of fun with it. Keep in mind some of my long rides can be ten mile round trips. Short rides for me are around three or four mile round trips. If you do that even two days a week. The miles can add up rather quickly. It's also rather funny with me. I complain the next day when I'm not achy from one of my more infamous "insanity rides." Such as the twelve mile loop I do that takes me around the campus of Saginaw Valley State University and back to my apartment. I don't do it often. But even that is a fun challenge for me. Weight loss, while important, isn't the primary goal. The ride helps my joints out. Also helps with my over all endurance and stamina. Along with a natural way to deal with my anxiety and depression.

This past week has been a week of "unknowns". This last crankshaft failure has brought me back to a reality that my cruiser is probably on borrowed time. I'm not easy one stuff at all. The bike is no exception. You ride hard enough at some point stuff will start to break. Which is part of the unknown. The question is should I repair the bike and ride things out. The frame is in great shape. But the bike is battered and beat up from years of heavy use. Some other stuff like the rims are going to need to be looked at as well. But also my balance isn't what it use to be. The cerebral palsy is catching up making me more of a fall risk than ever before. Yeah, I know the weight isn't doing me any favors on that issue either. But in the last six or seven years I've had some pretty major falls. Often taking direct hits on to my knees. My left knee isn't still back 100% from last year's stuff.

I've thought about getting a three-wheel bike. Long as I can ride that is all that matters to me. But I need one that is more or less industrial class. A bike made of stronger materials that can handle or at least tolerate some of my more longer rides. They make bikes that are rated up to 500lbs. But they are by no means cheap. Looking at least 800$ to $1000 for the bikes I've looked at. Not sure how I would be able to afford one. My parents can probably help out. But even still that is a lot of money even for them. That is one of the other unknowns. Figuring out how to pay for such a ride.

It's in the hands of God. All I can do is pray for the answers that I seek. Fact is I need to have some kind of transportation that is not connected to any of my rides. I need to have some level of freedom with out a car and the bike does just that. Not being able to use the bike has been hard on me. A level of frustration that is hard to describe but I suspect people know where I'm coming from. Pray that something can develop soon. I miss the ride already. Last time I took that fall last year. I was on the bike with in a few days. So not being able to ride is driving me up the wall....

Till next time.

-JM